Video Editor: Abhishek Sharma
Video Reporters: Sadaf Shabir, Fahim Mattoo
“They wanted to go on Haj but got caught up with life,” reminisced Dr Aijaz Ahmed about his conversations with Reshma, one of Kashmir’s most influential transgender persons. On 6 November, the wedding singer passed away in Srinagar after battling stomach cancer. They were in their seventies.
Reshma was an integral part of the LGBTQIA community in Kashmir, and was always at the forefront of movements championing the rights of their community, Dr Ahmed, author of Hijras of Kashmir, said.
Their death plunged the Valley into grief, and the transgender community into despair. The Quint spoke to their close friends and their followers.
Reshma's Life
Reshma was born as Abdul Rashid in downtown Srinagar. They had six brothers and two sisters. When Reshma was young, their family did not approve of their transition and took umbrage at their changing behaviour.
"Their childhood was full of conflict. They were discouraged from expressing their feminine side. There were constant beatings when Reshma insisted on singing or dancing at a wedding."Dr Aijaz Ahmed, Author, Hijras of Kashmir
They also faced bullying at school and had to drop out when they were in class five. Reshma then took to learning tailoring from their uncle but would still occasionally perform at weddings but only discreetly.
When Reshma was in their late 20’s, their younger brother passed away. This is when Reshma decided to take the guardianship of his three children.
Since the income from tailoring wasn’t enough to take care of the family, Reshma, who was fond of music and dance since an early age, started performing at wedding ceremonies to make ends meet. At this time, their family had become more tolerant, and had even accepted Reshma's cross-dressing.
Soon, they became a known name across the Valley. Their song Hai Hai Waisiye, which they sang at a wedding, went viral, turning Reshma into a singing sensation in the Valley.
'Encouraged Education Among Trans People'
“Wo ek aisa Chinar thay, jinhone apni jadein poore Kashmir mein phailayi thi.(They were like a Chinar tree, which has its roots spread across Kashmir),” said 19-year-old Khushi, and added that all of Kashmir is grieving their loss.
Khushi, a member of the transgender community, who is now pursuing higher education, said that Reshma was a strong advocate of education, pushing young transgender persons to study and build a career.
“Sometimes, they used to scold us, saying what will become of your life if you don’t study. They used to say that times are changing, and we must keep up. Those who took their advice are now doing well in life,” said Khushi.
One of their closest friends, Babloo, 52, said that Reshma was the tallest figure in Kashmir’s transgender community. Adding that they were also a very talented artiste, Babloo said, “Their song Hai Hai Waiseye became quite popular but they liked to sing (Islamic) Naats.”
Saddened by the loss of their friend, Babloo said, “Ye to Allah taala ka nizam hai. Ab kya pata unke (Reshma) ke jaise kon ubhar ke ayega? (This is Allah's will. Now who knows if we will have another one like Reshma?)”
Shabnum Subhan, 75, also mourned the demise of their close friend Reshma, and said, “If a family of 10 members loses their father, what can they do? They have to accept and move on. Similarly, we will also bear this loss together and move on.”
'She Identified as a Proud Muslim Transwoman'
Reshma was not only an artiste but also a transgender activist. They were able to give name and recognition to the entire transgender community in Kashmir.
"The mission and vision of their life was that the transgender community receives dignity and equality in the society. They would often intervene to ensure that the trans children are not disowned by the family members," Dr Ahmed said.
Adding that Reshma was religious, Dr Ahmed explained that they had an intricate relationship with their faith and their identity.
"They would proudly claim to be a Muslim transwoman," he remarked.
In 2011, Reshma, along with other transgender activitsts, approached the state's social welfare department to initiate an 'Intervention Plan', aimed at rehabilitating transgender persons in the Valley.
The plan is still with the department, they could not implement it citing that it requires a nod from the cabinet.
(At The Quint, we question everything. Play an active role in shaping our journalism by becoming a member today.)