‘We Are Not Just Kashmiri Pandits or Muslims, We Are a Family’

Not all Kashmiri pandits feel isolated in Kashmir, as shown by the eternal friendship of Farida and Pinky Kaul.

Pinky Kaul and Farida in Kashmir.

(Photo: Daanish Bin Nabi/Altered by The Quint)

Kashmiri Muslims have always expressed their love and respect for Pandits and have always valued them as part of the Kashmiri society. However, Kashmiri Muslims were labelled as communal or terrorists after incidents of hundred of Pandits being killed came to the fore.

Keeping all the narratives aside, it was only in March 2016 that the residents of Khanqah-e-Sokhta Nawakadal in Shaher-e-Khaas had performed the last rites of a Kashmiri Pandit woman, who belonged to a lone family of the minority community. Doora Pajnu (65), wife of Omkar Pajnu, breathed her last that month.

It was reported that in the wee hours, Kashmiri Muslims called an emergency meeting of Masjid Sharief Khanqah-e-Sokhta’s management committees to put in place her last rites arrangements.

Lending a Helping Hand in the Last Journey

The Muslims participated in the funeral procession and accompanied the Pandit family to the cremation ground at Karan Nagar. After performing the rites, the locals spent the day with the bereaved relatives.

This is not the only case. There are several similar cases which do not find prominence in the media.

Few years ago, the inhabitants of Nawa Kadal had also performed the last rites of a Pandit woman Sushila Kaul, who was living alone in her house.

On 18 May 2016, Prof Ganjoo of Barbarshah, Srinagar lost his wife. This time too the Muslim neighbours had taken care of all the necessary arrangements of the woman’s last rites. Kashmiri Muslims took the body to the cremation ground and looked after the guests.

Farida and Pinky Kaul, the Eternal Friends

Friendship between two different communities in a conflict-torn region is a rare sight. One such sight can be seen in the dusty, smelly Ompura area of Budgam district.

Farida, a Kashmiri Muslim and Pinky Kaul, a Kashmiri Pandit have been friends since the the last five years. Though five years may not be long, their bond of friendship seems strong.

While narrating how they became friends, Farida says:

Some five years ago I met Pinky by the roadside. We became friends while having a simple interaction. Since then we are friends. (sic)

Interrupting her, Pinky jumps into the conversation. She says:

We were just making a plan on where to go for a vacation together.

While Farida works at a pashmina mill, Pinky stays home. She spends most of her time doing daily household chores.

Farida adds:

It does not matter to me which religion a person belongs to. Whenever I make new friends I cannot leave them or step back. Same goes with Pinky. She is my friend and will remain so till I am alive. During Eid or whenever we have our religious functions, I always take Pinky along. My father also believes that he has two daughters – Farida and Pinky.

She adds:

Her brothers are like my own brothers. We are one family. There is no Hindu-Muslim divide between the two families. Pinky respects her elders. Whenever she sees my father or brother, she will always cover her head with a scarf. It is one of those things about her that I am fond of.

Pinky Kaul with her elder brothers.(Photo: Daanish Bin Nabi/ The Quint)

Wearing a pink suit, Pinky laughs and says:

Whenever I have some work in Budgam, I first go and visit her house. Then in the evenings she comes to visit us and returns home only after eight or nine. Until then we both keep chatting.

When the marriage reception of Pinky’s sister was held in Jammu, Farida had travelled with the Kaul family. Pinky says:

My sister got married in Jammu. I took Farida along. She was with us for 16 days until all our functions were over. She made friends there as well.

An excited Farida interrupts:

Everyone got confused at the reception when they saw me. They were wondering how I was being able to cope with a different atmosphere in a different setup. They were all surprised and shocked to see our friendship.

Enter Vijay Kumar Kaul and Rajni Kaul

This discussion was interrupted by Vijay Kumar Kaul and Rajni Kaul – Pinky’s elder brother and sister – and an intense discussion followed.

Vijay says:

We did not leave Kashmir in 1990s. We were poor and there was not much that we could do under such circumstances in Jammu.

Rajni quickly adds:

But our neighbours also insisted us to stay. Our Muslim friends supported us during the tough times and did not allow us to leave. They took up the responsibility of protecting us.

She further says:

We have seen a lot of hardship in our life, but our Muslim neighbours have always stood by us. They would come and sleep at our home during my wedding. Even during militancy, they would not leave our side and ensure that we were not harmed in any way. My father was always respected and even today when he is no more among us, people have not forgotten him (her father died few years ago).

When our parents died, we did not know how they were cremated. Everything was managed by our Muslim neighbours. When militancy erupted, armed men were kept on vigil outside our house. It was because of these men with arms that women from our Muslim neighbourhood could not come to fetch water from the fresh water tap right outside our house. They felt threatened. So my father urged the authorities to get the “security” removed.

But at the same time, the Kaul family says they support the Pandit colonies because of space constraints at their ancestral home.

Yes, we do support Pandit colonies so that we could get a flat there. We have very little space here. We are willing to move if they provide us a quarter. We would not love to move to these colonies, but will have to if the government provides us a place.

Vijay Kaul says:

The government has provided everything to the migrants but absolutely nothing has been done for the non-migrant Pandits. We have submitted all the documents of rehabilitation, jobs and other necessities, but nothing has been done for us so far.

Neighbour Sunil Kumar seconds Vijay saying:

The government is indifferent to us being dead or alive. They have provided us no facility. Our Muslim neighbours are far better than them.

(The writer is a Srinagar-based freelance journalist. He can be reached at @DaanishNabi . This is the third part of a three-part series. You may like to read part one and part two. This is an opinion piece and The Quint neither endorses nor is responsible for the same.)

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